Not that there’s anything wrong with that…

I’ve never considered myself one for friendships, but for some reason when it comes to the “F-word”, I’ve always been naturally more comfortable and closer to the female population. It’s just a fact; my closest friends (bar one or two exceptions) have always been girls.

This has never really been a problem, but lately, I’ve found myself absolutely craving “guy conversation”.

I think maybe it’s just the age my f-words and I are reaching. You know, the age where everything is seemingly about family, marriage and kids or Robert Pattinson.

As I think over my 31 years, there are many circumstances leading directly to this.

Being raised by a single mother since my dad and older brother died certainly didn’t leave much room for guy conversation – so that ruled out a lot of growing up around guy stuff.

Being forced to grow up too soon of course prevented the clubbing with the boys and drinking aspect of partying and having a night out with the boys.

Then of course girls find it very comfortable being around me because I’m such a nice guy (and modest too)….flipside of that though – most guys find me a threat to their girls/wives.

Finally, there is my complete lack of interest in most things guy like. I hate rugby, get annoyed with braaing (BBQ’s for you international readers), and drinking and, if you know me well enough, you know I don’t know the difference between a Mercedes Benz and a BMW – or even how many horses it takes to power them.

Why is it that I’m now craving some type of male banter, when I know it will just irritate me.

Maybe it’s time to visit a strip club? Seeing as though my only other experience was not exactly what you would consider fun. The story? In 1997 – the year after high school when a bunch of us schoolmates ventured to a joint in order to see a nice erotic dancer entertain us to our wildest desires. Well, the night started off with me drinking way too much coke light (so brain freeze from the ice cubes), and ended with a gap toothed East Rand girl putting on a dance routine that involved melting ice on her “hot body” while she shook her booty. The stripping followed and she proceeded to toss the ice cube into the crowd. Lucky me… I was in the direct line of fire and the ice cube struck me directly in my glasses cracking one of the lenses. Awesome. I got to see out one for the rest of the night and be scarred with the memory of seeing a stripper with one nipple.

In the end, I guess I’m just a better fit with women. Plus I love flirting, so I guess its one of those “double edged sword” situations.

But I really want to talk about how sexy some girl is, or what they look like nekkid.
I want to make penis jokes – because they are funny.
Even sharing the much hyped story about losing my virginity didn’t seem as effective when I shared it with female friends…

Some guys just don’t get that luxury I guess.

Now if I can just get rid of that pesky “he’s probably gay” stigma….


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4 Responses to “Not that there’s anything wrong with that…”

  1. Tanya Says:

    What??!! You lost your virginity? NOOOOOOO!

    Nice read Shauno. tan

  2. Michelle Daniels Says:

    Maybe you should hang with a lesbian….

  3. Ann Says:

    I reckon a night out at my special place in Greymont will do you the world of good! Only thing is I know YOU WON’T GO! With one of your excuses which is why you are gaaning on about not having a life. TRUST ME, you won’t be sorry

  4. Burgsworld: The Essential Collection – Part 1: Rants & Opinions « Burgs World – A guide to cutting through the stupidity of life Says:

    […] Not that there’s anything wrong with that… Am I gay? Or just a nice guy? Throw in a strip club story and I’ll tell you… […]

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