Posts Tagged ‘goals’

Burg. Writer

November 6, 2013

Hey everyone, as this travel blog has come to an end for a while, I’d like to encourage you to follow me on my next adventure, as I prepare to finish my first ever book, and get it out there for everyone to read.

If you’ve enjoyed these posts, my book is full of many similar adventures, mishaps and heartbreakingly humorous situations.

Hopefully you have a facebook account, because you can like my official page here http://www.facebook.com/shaunmyburgwrites and I’ll be revealing the premise of the book when I hit 50 likes!

Thank you for the support, we’ve only just begun!

Burg

The Zen of Burg – 10 Steps To A Happier Me (Part 2)

April 19, 2012

Right, so if you’ve read part 1, you will know what this part 2 is about 🙂

6. The New Me, Same as the Old Me

Over the years the most noticeable things to disappear from my life were my smile, my laugh and my self-confidence. Finding a picture of me smiling from the last 7 years is about as likely as finding gold in a hobo’s dentures. Over the last few months, all of those missing elements have begun to return. A lot of it can be credited to my new work colleagues who have a very similar sense of humour to me, and they truly bring out the old me that I know so many of my friends once knew. I laugh more, smile more, and have the confidence to be the person I really am again.

The me at home is VERY different to the me out in the real world, and for the longest time, the real me stayed at home permanently. I wasn’t fun to be around, I could barely hold conversation with people without getting annoyed to the point of wanting to drown them in a small shallow bucket. I’m at my best when I am funny and witty. I love to make people laugh and lighten the mood. That’s my gift. I make people feel good. When I couldn’t do that, I felt incomplete, and quite honestly worthless. Now I feel I can walk into a room and light it up again if need be. I walk with an air of confidence again, I take pride in the way I dress. It’s certainly not like this 24/7 , but now I don’t feel like the short fat kid who has to sit in the corner at the school dance anymore. I’m the short fat kid who asks the prom queen to dance again.

7. Live for the moments.

I am the KING of the big gesture, I used to do so many epic things for people (yes, girls), to try and win them over and convince them of my awesomeness, 99.9% of the time it backfired and I often didn’t get so much as a thank you. Yet I didn’t learn, I kept doing it, because I enjoyed doing those things, but selfishly I wanted something back from it, even if it was just a thank you. Those sort of things can be so draining to both your heart and soul. The easy answer was I was doing it for the wrong reasons, or so friends would always tell me, but then when the next “target” came along, I would commit the same foul.

Over the last few months, a light switch finally went off in my head that allowed me to admit that I was doing it for the wrong reasons. However, and this is a big however, so take note. This does not mean I should stop doing it. I ENJOY the big gestures, the work or research (called creeping these days), that goes into a big gift, or heartfelt gesture, so why should I stop doing it? No, instead, I need to change the reasons as to why I’m doing it. I no longer expect anything in return. I do it now because to simply make someone’s day is good enough for me. It makes me happy. Whether it be friends, a love interest or a complete stranger. I like to show that romance and magical moments still exist. Now I live for those moments. The moment of telling a beautiful girl in the elevator that she is in fact a beautiful girl, then simply walking away with no further interaction needed. Sending someone flowers, anonymously or otherwise, simply to make them smile knowing that someone made an effort for them that day.

So be warned, you may in fact be the recipient of a #BurgMoment… when you least expect it, something good could happen to you. You may get flowers, you may get your lunch bill paid for, you may have a clowns show up at your office, you may get invited to an all-expenses paid holiday. There are so few genuinely good moments in life, that sometimes you have to make your own. I notice everyone and I’m happy to say these moments have already started happening… so you could be next!

8. Don’t Give a Damn about People Opinions, But Stand Up For Yourself.

I’d always been “too nice”, too nice to rock the boat, too nice to complain, and too worried about what people might think about me, didn’t wanna embarrass myself you know. I had my pride. (This was always a very strange contraction to my outside appearance, with my tattoos, piercings and clothing, I always seemed to attract attention. I had an aura about me that drew people towards me). This effectively led to me being screwed over way too often and always coming out with the short end of the stick.

Then something changed. It might have been the 5 years in the music industry that hardened me, or maybe that was just part of it. But somewhere along the line I became a bonefide badass. You didn’t mess with me. If I am in the right, I will fight till the bitter end to make sure I come out the victor. Customer services and banks around the country know this better than anyone. I don’t accept cr@ppy service, I don’t accept being spoken down too, and I don’t allow people to be bullied. I stand up for those who feel they don’t have a voice anymore. I’m still learning the fine are of not going too far with making a point, and admittedly, sometimes I do push it too far, but I blame all the pent up aggression I have inside me. However, I’m glad I have hardened the eff up. And you know what? I have gotten more freebies, gift vouchers, apologies, and service than I have even had in my life. Score a point to the little guy.

9. Open to Trying New Things

I have always been so stuck in my ways. As much as a free spirit as I am, it takes a lot for me to break out of my own personal mould. It’s always been frustrating for people, because if my mind is made up, there is no changing it. Ok ok, let’s just cut to the chase, I will finally admit it. I am stubborn, fussy and hard to please….wow, I can actually hear about 400 people collectively saying “I told you so”. But I do admit it, and this is what has led to a lot of arguments with friends. Lately however, I have been so open to trying new things. Whether it’s something simple like a food I hate that I’ve never actually eaten, or maybe going out somewhere I don’t like with friends just to be with friends, or heck maybe even the reverse cowboy…I more than willing to entertain new things in my life. Maybe it’s something that comes with age, I’m not quite sure…all I know is that the way I’ve been living wasn’t making me happy. Of course I do all this within reason, it’s not like I’m living the life of sex, drugs and rock ‘n roll now simply because being sXe wasn’t working for me, however I am now open to that cocktail on the beach in Hawaii or that beer in Germany…

10. I am Awesome.

To steal a catchphrase from The Miz. I am awesome, and I need to keep believing that to survive this crazy ride through the rest of my life. I’m a good person, and so proud of that, because there are very few of us left. In a world that is getter meaner and crueller by the day, it is us few white knights who need to keep the hope alive; the hope of something better out there, something good and caring.

I take this role very seriously; I like to bring hope to people but in an honest way. That has always been the purpose of this blog, and my life. I have seen it all and been through more, and it’s these life lessons that give others strength. There may be a touch of arrogance to what I say, buy my life has never really been my own, and I finally understand that. My experiences, the tragedy and the triumphs are given to me because I can handle them. I live my life openly, and this blog has never been shy of revealing things that most people are ashamed of, but I do it so that if just one person can relate to it, it’s been worth it. I’ve always seen myself as a person who comes into people’s lives when they need me the most. I offer comfort when others cannot. People tend to trust me and share their problems with me, which while overwhelming at times (especially when it’s not something I can physically help with), is something of an honour.

As my blog approaches that magical milestones of 100,000 views, I’d like to take this time to thank #TeamBurg old and new for supporting me, for loving me, for hating me, for having a reaction to what I say. I write because I feel I have something to say, and I always encourage you to do the same.

The Zen of Burg: 10 Steps to a Happier Me (Part 1)

April 19, 2012


The path to happiness is different for everyone. There is no hard and fast rule on how to get there, and of course, one person’s idea of happiness may leave another scratching their head. So each to their own I guess.
Now that all the clichés are out the way, I can get down to this blog’s real purpose.

It’s been a tough few months obviously, those who follow me have seen the drama first hand, as I’ve never held back sharing anything I’ve been through. Lately however, I’ve been feeling a permanent state of contentment, and seemingly happiness. It’s not happiness by definition though, there is still a lot of issues and drama I deal with on a daily basis, a lot of which would make most people give up on life, but for the first time I have found some balance in my life, and for a Libra, balance is VERY important.

As I sat back and thought about what exactly brought about this change in me during a very significant time in my life, I was (much to my surprise!) able to identify 10 specific reasons why I have this sense of calm over me lately.

1. Big Dreams, Smaller Steps

You all know about my obsessions. The New York deal, the being a writer deal etc etc, and I know most people are sick to death of me constantly talking about it. Well, have a think about it, and you’ll actually realize I’ve been very quiet about it for the last few months. Not because I’ve given up on it, but I’ve realized that every time I get close to it, someone moves the proverbial goal posts further away. My solution to this is to make smaller goals, but more of them.

To achieve my dreams, I need to slice up life into just a few more pieces, this helps to avoid such big disappointments. There will always be an end goal, but for now, I’m content to chase smaller dreams in the hope that they will all add up in the end.

2. New Job

Another thing that was well documented was my unhappiness in my old job, and the people I with whom worked. The simple solution was to walk away from everything I knew for the last 5 years and start again. A silly, not very well thought out decision, but one that had to be made. And now 8 months later I can honestly say I made the right decision.

I have a great job, in a great location, and work with some great people. People I get along with, can joke with, and more importantly, people who have given me a fair, clean slate. Instead of judging me on things I have gone through. It’s a wonderfully liberating feeling.

3. Traffic vs Train

One of the worst things about living in South Africa is the traffic. Well, not so much the traffic, but the idiots on the road who get away with the most shocking disregard to road rules you will ever see. On a daily basis this would anger me, fuelling so much rage inside that I would be tense and irritable all day long. It was bad… very bad. I would chase down taxis who cut me off, forced me off the road, drove in emergency lanes… it was making me a very angry and hateful person. Not in a racist way, as some people liked to blame it on black drivers in this country. I don’t care if you’re black, white, yellow or green. An idiot is an idiot. However I just didn’t like the person it forced me to be. Also, not having my own car was a downer.

Thankfully with the new job, and the recent implementation of the Gautrain (a public train system for my international readers), I was able to change my way of travelling, and I can honestly say, this was the best decision I’ve ever made. It’s changed my view on life in a big way. I feel more carefree, more relaxed and most importantly, it now gives me time to appreciate people more. I’m a big people watcher. I love seeing how people react to situations and such. It also fools me into thinking I’m living a New York or London lifestyle, which keeps me content for the time being.

4.More Time for Friends, new and old; Less time for People who Make Me Feel Bad.

This was a very important thing for me, and hopefully something a few of you have picked up on too. I’ve made a genuine effort to speak to my friends more, and in fact try and see them more. In the last 2 months, I have seen more old friends than I have in the last 5 years. I say yes a lot more when people ask me out, or ask if they can visit, and in fact I encourage it.

I still have promises to a lot of people I very much intend to keep. I still have a few issues with transport and such, but they will come right soon enough. I’ve also been open to making new friends, something I had forced myself to become too cautious with over the last few years. Thankfully, I have made friends with some wonderful new people which has made my circle that little bit bigger. As for those who have added no value to my life, I have taken the Scorched Earth approach to them and snuffed them out my life completely without compromise. It’s best for both parties. No longer do I beg people to be my friend, because the truth is they probably never will be, if I have to do that. I have learned appreciation for my friends old and new.

5. More Accepting of Help

Ok, this has clearly been the toughest one. Through all my struggle I have always tried to handle things alone…often with disastrous consequences. I always felt so guilty about accepting help from friends, as if I had failed or let everyone down (which in some cases I have), but now if someone offers to help, and I need it, I take it with a thankful heart, and a promise not to abuse that trust. I’ve learned my lessons the hard way in taking people up on their offers, but now I understand what goes into gestures like that. I am so thankful to #TeamBurg and I couldn’t even begin to thank everyone by name for fear of leaving someone out. I would not be here today if it wasn’t for you guys, and I always appreciate the kind words you have for me, and the encouragement you send my way, even if at times I come across as a cranky old b@st@rd.

Stay tuned for the part 2 of this blog later tonight…

New Burg’s Resolutions…Doing It The Hard Way

January 27, 2011

While most people tend to set their goals (or is that resolutions) at the beginning of the year, I tend to give it an extra month or so to make sure I REALLY mean what I say.

As we approach the end of January, it’s easy to look back say “well, that’s a month wasted”…but…I like to do things the hard way, and play catch-up.

You all know about the big goals, because I’ve been waxing lyrical about them since you’ve known me….and longer than that for others of you.

I’m currently sick (again), and can’t help but think to myself oh no, not again – based on my health track record from the last 18 months. From tick bite fever, to mystery super bugs, to cancer scares and even a lacerated sphincter.

For those who are still reading after that last one, my first goal for this year is quite simply my health.

I’ve finally decided to join the gym, and making the decision is truly half the battle. When you look like Kung Fu Panda without the chi, joining a gym is perhaps the most intimidating thing you can do.

The only time I was ever in a gym was back in 2004 when I was on the fake gym set on a local soapie where I portrayed the troubled, but loveable “gym extra #4”.

Luckily I’ve found two ways to distract myself from the body issues that plague me. A) I’m joining the gym with the girl who I was in love with and haven’t seen since the day my heart was broken into a million little pieces. B) I’m joining a gym that was exposed on a recent consumer watch program, and has the worst reputation of all the franchises.

But I really do want to look good and be able to walk up a flight of stairs without sounding like Darth Vader.

Second on my list, is I want to do a new movie. I’ve missed the freedom that acting has allowed me over the years, and while my movie count only stands at five (two features and 3 short films), I’m still dying for something meatier.

That being said, if no movies come my way, I’m currently working on a screenplay I’m totally in love with (thanks to those who have shared their feedback on it). Of course I’m writing it with me in mind, but a promise is a promise, and I’m writing a bunch of roles which with certain people amongst you in mind.

When I’m done writing…then what? Well I don’t know…but maybe I could use all this money I’ve come into to fund the movie…that might be an option.

Thirdly, this will be the year I become a published author. I have started work on my key book, with several other’s in the stop start process, but I have the confidence to believe what I’m writing has a place in this world. Again, the question is what to do with it when its done. The plan is to try pitch it to some publishers when I’m over in New York – yeah I know, dream big eh? But fact of the matter is, I want the big time.

The book will essentially be a collection of my more emotional and personal blogs, structured together to form exactly what I preach about here…a guide to cutting through the stupidity of life. The end goal will be deal with a lot of personal issues that people go through in my honest and humorous way.

There is a lot of work ahead of me. As well as some impossible tasks, I may need some help along the way, and more importantly, I need to avoid the manic depression that has plagued me most of my life.

The destiny of course is that all this will lead me to a happy and successful life in New York City, perhaps the only place where I will find my peace and inspiration that I crave on a daily basis.

I mentioned in yesterday’s blog how I need a partner in crime. I goes far beyond what I spoke about then. I need someone who believes in what I do and what I want as much as I will believe in what she wants to achieve.

This has to be the year this all happens.

Oh…and I also would mind having sex for the second time in my life…that would be pretty cool.

Sharlto You are My Hero…

October 1, 2009

sharlto
I have three passions in my life.
Music, Film & Writing (four if you count my love for the WWE).

There’s not a day that doesn’t go by without me being thankful I work in the music industry as a full time job.

I’m lucky enough to dabble in the film and TV industry when the opportunities present themselves, and truth me told, if I was brave enough I would try being an actor/writer on a full time basis.

Being South African, which is mostly embarrassing at times, it’s very difficult to make a career out of film, for many reasons, of which I won’t go into now. But its also ridiculously disheartened at times. Unless you’re prepared to make a career as a soapie actor or “that guy from that commercial”, film recognition is something that’s reserved for the elite few.

I dream of being a big star. I dream of working with my idols and heroes. I dream of winning an Oscar and making the funniest most heartfelt speech (straight after I make out with Halle Berry).
And 99%, that’s all it will ever amount to. A dream.

But there are times when something happens that motivates me so that I believe wholeheartedly in the ridiculously impossible. They are few and far between.
But today I experienced another one of them.

The first however should be noted. It was that very moment Charlize Theron won the Oscar and made her speech saying she’s bring the Oscar back to South Africa.
I doubt my feeling was one of being proudly South African, I’m not THAT contradictory. It was more of a feeling of “I can do it too!” – no not win best Actress, but rather work my way up there.

The second such moment as I said happened today.

Following on the groundbreaking success of “District 9”, its unknown South African star Sharlto Copley was elevated to that level the rest of us dream of.

He was quickly cast as “Howling Mad” Murdoch in the big screen adaption of an 80s serious I grew up on – The A-Team. (I still have my action figures on my desk to this very day).

Even as the news was rumored and then later confirmed, it’s something that didn’t quite set in.

As I browsed my daily film news sites, I came across this image that literally put me on District cloud 9 and made me believe in the impossible.
ateamsetsmall
Here is a guy who was just walking down the street in SA one day…and is now starring with the likes of Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper and Jessica Biel.

I can’t even imagine how his mind is processing all of this. For me its like a dream.

Is it all about hard work and sticking to the task?
Is it all about the lucky break?
Is it about destiny?

Maybe it’s simply the right combination of all three.

It’s not about chasing the fame. It’s about chasing the dream…..and my friends… I may be the biggest dreamer of them all.