As a people observer, it’s always fascinating to me to watch how people react to something that’s perceived as out of the norm.
Do they overreact and panic? Do they become more casual than normal? Or do they simply take time to assess what’s going on and react accordingly.
I recently decided to take time away from everything and everyone. The blog, social networks and the cyber world at large I stopped cold turkey.
I didn’t go anywhere…I got up and went to work as per normal. For everyone who saw me on a daily basis, it was business as usual.
However, on the social network’s there was panic!
People were concerned I had done something stupid! I had decide to cash it all in!
There was a flood of emails, wall comments and BBM messages.
In truth nobody picked up a phone to see if I was “ok”, wait I lie…someone did, but they had an old number from before I got hijacked, so they are excused.
There were those that didn’t notice, and those that didn’t care.
It’s ok, people have their own lives. I understand that.
My choice to step away from all things online was a very deliberate choice. Maybe it was a lethal cocktail of burnout, pressure and just being totally sick of the fakeness of it all.
People annoyed me. They still do.
But I’ve all but turned into a hermit, so it’s not unexpected.
I’ve never hidden away from the openness of my life; I’ve always shared everything with you guys. Good, bad and controversial.
However for once, I needed to totally close myself off from opinions and advice.
I needed to take in and deal with the stress of the world, the tragedies I was dealing with and the frustrations that have me hanging on the edge.
There was a lot I could share with everyone to help them understand what was going on. But most of it was not my story to tell…not yet anyways. (when its turned into a thrilling tv land miniseries, then everyone will know)
My work has become my sole focus.
It’s my home away from home.
It’s my substitute of inspiration.
It’s my ticket out of here.
I’m now at a point I’m comfortable in my position and direction at work, that I feel the wheels are in motion for my future.
With that I feel ready to focus on other aspects of my life.
My New York trip will happen. Solo it seems. Unfortunately my “deserving partner” did a disappearing trick of her own and only decided to sms me several months later to see how I am. It always hurts when it feels like i’m chasing after someone to be my friend or to be liked. Taste of my own meds one might say.
I’ve seen the worst of life these last few months, I’ve taken a beating emotionally. I’ve made life harder on myself and I’ve fought the good fight.
However, I do feel ready to step back into life and try something different, because Lord knows the last few years haven’t worked.
My blogs will return to the focus of observing people and the world in complete honesty. I will offer my thoughts on topics most people shy away from, but i’ll always keep it honest, even at the good chance of being completely disliked.
I guess I’m more open to change now. More open to experiencing life. But ultimately more understanding that people will let you down, they will over promise, they will say things just because they think it’s the right thing to say, but in the end they do all these things because they are human, who am I to judge them because of that?
….well I am The Burg…and I’m back!